Thursday, February 11, 2010

Smooth skin and emotional steam

It would be funny how addictive gluten and dairy are, except it isn't! After the day where I succumbed to the junky snacks and that piece of piece, I had gluten and/or dairy again for the next two or three days. Every time, I tried to stay away, but every time, I felt like I had no control of my actions! Each day I had a little less, though - the last was a single stolen bite of my hubby's mac'n'cheese. Since then it's been much easier.
My salt cravings are still intense. I remind myself to eat salt-containing healthy foods, like miso broth or nori (the seaweed used to roll sushi, which I just love to snack on!), and that usually handles it, but sometimes I eat a salty snack anyway.
So, I'm plugging away at the six-week detox. I've got a cold, which isn't making things easier, but I'm sticking to it nonetheless. I'm determined to get more exercise.
My skin is smoothing out some. Oddly enough, the eczema isn't getting any better, and my face is still covered in the tiny bumps that I think of as preceding pimples, though it's been years since I actually got full-fledged pimples all over my face. It's usually just these tiny bumps with occasional pimples. Where I don't have the eczema, though, my skin is softer and regaining healthy elasticity. This is one of the biggest things I wanted out of this detox, so I'm excited about it. I will be more excited when my eczema actually goes away. I'd like to lose a little weight, too, but I understand that my body has higher priorities right now, so I'll be patient.

The "emotional detox" has continued to be pretty intense, making me very, very glad to have a very supportive husband and supportive friends around me. One of the biggest realizations I had was how much my friends me to me and why I am "meanest" (most prone to be a bit snippy) to those closest to me. I only feel safe expressing my anger with the people that make me feel safe, that I believe won't hate or hurt or leave me if I express my anger. That I am now able to explain this I think makes it easier when I am snippy to a good friend.
And meanwhile I'm working on other issues, so that I can express anger, frustration, and other "negative" emotions in a healthy, gradual way, rather than bottling them up and blowing up at someone.

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